12 March 2008

Note to the unaware

Dear Repining in Lisbon:

  • If you happen to find yourself very expectedly at a poultry abattoir, surrounded by painfully loud machinery despite earplugs and flying debris in the shape of mites feathers, mites dust and mites unappealing unidentifiables;
  • if you are often forced to skip to avoid stepping on a, say, beak, or a leg, sometimes a whole head;
  • if you are liberally sprayed with chickeny water everywhere you go and have no alternative but to actually duck under the wet and dripping carcasses to get to the next station repeatedly with only a flimsy hair net for protection;
  • if the pungent smell of thankfully very dead freshly-scalded chickens is turning your stomach even through the lab coat held against your mouth for you are given no masks;
  • you are very right to try and think of a diversion, obviously something that could take your mind off it for a bit, obviously something that could be undertaken while standing and even walking,
  • but maybe, just maybe, doing your kegels was not the best of choices.

Best regards,
This Comes From a Place of Love

4 furballs:

Old Bald Helen said...

Hahaha! Funniest piece of advice I've read in years!

Diana said...

Oh, dear.

Perhaps it's time to keep a scented mask in your car, along with a large, rubber hat and maybe a wet suit.

Best to be prepared with more than Kegel's.

(But what on earth made you think of Kegel's?) And now I will be forced to think of the poultry slaughterhouse of hell when I think of Kegel's. Thanks for that, dahling.

Udge said...

Surely any chicken that is hung up and dripping is no longer in need of a vet?

Lioness said...

Old Bald Helen, now you know.

Diana, I don't know! Actually I do, butt clenching wasn't working bcs we kept having to move around and the horror was too much so I thought of kegels only now the horror is of a different sort bcs I have been imprinted, as it were. *shudder*

Udge, oh but they is, they is! Vets need to make sure than no chicken was allowed through that may represent a public health risk, that carcasses are stored properly, that they are dead when scalded etc.